I think part of my last post sounded really negative and I didn't mean it that way. I just really need people to be honest with me rather than nice to me. I really do appreciate all the love and support y'all give me.
I also forgot to mention in my last post that I have a goal............
I'm going to Colorado for Christmas this year, and I'd really like for there to be a visible difference in my physique when I see my family next. I'm not going to say it has to be this many pounds or this many inches, I just want there to be a significant change in my appearance. Oh, I also want to be able to climb up the little trail between my sister's house and their garden. I did it last time I was there, but I think my sister's friend Sarah was really afraid for my life (as was I frankly).
I have to say that emailing my therapist on a daily basis is really helpful. I have to look at my schedule for the day and say, this is when I'm going to eat and this is what I'm going to eat. It completely eliminates the need to drive-thru somewhere, unless that's on the plan. Like last week I knew I was only going to have a few minutes between working at Starbucks and teaching a CPR class. I'm going to have to drive-thru somewhere, but because I knew that ahead of time and I set my intention to get a grilled chicken sandwich instead of a hamburger I stuck to it. I also know that if I'm working at Starbucks from 10am - 2pm (right through lunchtime), I'm going to have to bring a Lean Cuisine or a sandwich so that I can eat it on my break (they are really strict about making sure we always get a 10 min break even during a short little shift). I really lucked out with this lady, she is awesome.
Our next visit is next week and we are going to discuss EFT which is a technique where you isolate a pain or a stressor and you tap on acupressure points on your body and its supposed to help eliminate the emotional memory that is causing a problem. I vaguely remember a guy doing this on TV about five years ago, but I didn't take it very seriously. Now that I've seen some scientific studies and documentation I think I might be able to practice it a little better. If it works for me I am seriously considering studying it and incorporating it as part of my massage practice.
As far as my week went, I had some ups and downs emotionally and I managed to stick to the plan pretty much on a daily basis. The very first day I was having some serious with-drawls, I guess from sugar because soda is the only thing I've really eliminated. I'm still eating carbs, I'm still eating meat, I'm still eating sodium. Although I'm eating much less of all of it and much better quality of all of it. Even during my searing headache I stuck to the plan I had set for myself that day. Had a couple of really good days after that. My birthday was a little bit of a challenge, its really hard for me to be away from my family on my birthday. I'm 38, broke and childless. But even through that little emotional roller-coaster I stuck to the plan. Well I did add shrimp to my dinner and had a white mocha on the way home from dinner, but I didn't eat two Double Quarter Pounders and two large fries and no soda at all which is amazing because soda had really become my "crack". Being home with Steve all day is actually more of a challenge than I thought it would be. He doesn't necessarily want to eat what I eat or when I eat, but I managed to get through it.
I have also recruited two of my good friends to go walking with me. We've been walking in the mall because its been kinda rainy. That's been so much fun. We get to talk about our challenges and life's issues. I get to see my friends that I normally don't get to see very often. Its another thing that makes me look at my schedule and say, "When can I walk?" Instead of using my schedule as a reason for not walking.
I look forward to getting on the scale. I'm so proud of the work I've done I just know it's going to end in a good result. Dealing with a not-so-good result will be something I have to work with my therapist about because that has always been a hurdle for me.
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