Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh...big sigh. Gained 3lbs.
This month started out with a huge hassle that led me to a completely unhealthy binge and it just never ended. I can't even blame a busy work schedule, because up until this week July was one of my slowest month's so far. It was just laziness.
Maybe I need to go to an AA meeting or something. It really is like drinking, I just can't help myself. I really need to treat my diet like sobriety. I am going to die if I keep eating like this. The thing is...I say that and I know that...but when it comes time to drive through Hardees I completely forget about it.
My friend Rina came to visit last weekend. She has had lap-band surgery. It was so nice to have her here because she eats really healthy now, so it made me make good choices (except for the 3 bottles of wine we drank....we put fruit in it does that make it healthier? HaHa). Although if she had said, "Screw it let's eat burgers!" I would have totally done it.
I know I've said this before, and it hasn't made me change my ways, but I can only hope that someone will read this and it will stick with them. This week a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to muscle and joint pain. I haven't been eating nearly enough fruits and vegetables and I am feeling it. All my aches and pains that had disappeared two months ago are all back. I also have been breaking out like a teenager, which may have to do with this ridiculous heat, but I think if I was eating nutrient-dense food it would actually clear up my skin.
I went to the store today and bought tons of stuff for salads and soup and whole wheat pasta for vegetarian spaghetti (by the way I do not recommend Nate's Meatless Meatballs, Quorn Meatballs are much better). So hopefully August will be a better month.
I don't have a great recipe for this post. That's one of the things I've been slacking on, need to get out the cookbooks.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
7/18/10
Sorry it's been so long since my last blog, I've had two very chaotic weekends with two very slow work weeks in between. Slow work weeks, of course, equal a tons of time to blog, and plan meals and get some exercise (yeah right), more time to stress about money. Ironically one of my chaotic weekends ended up saving me money, because my July 4th trip to PA fell through (very long and complicated story). And the following weekend ended up costing me all that money because my dog decided to collapse on the lawn on a Sunday. She couldn't have done it on a Monday when the regular vet is open, nope she had to do it on a Sunday so we had to take her to the emergency vet and spend triple the amount. And... THERE WAS NOTHING WRONG WITH HER!!! She collapsed, was woozy all morning all the way to the vet, actually collapsed again at the vet, and then they did a bunch of tests and found nothing. Plus when the vet came out to tell me this she said Rosie had been awake and alert and wagging her tail in the crate in the back the whole time. She has been right back to her usual perky self all week. Who knows? We figure she either ate something weird on our walk last Sunday morning or just had a random seizure.I think that this blog is turning into a "why do I eat when I'm stressed" blog rather than a blog about the importance of a nutrient-dense diet. Instead of going to PA we went to our friends house for July 4th and ate a whole bunch of junk (by choice, I think if I had said I wanted to eat healthy and vegetarian Katy would have been all for it). All week long after the 4th I found myself stopping at fast food places...like everyday. The weekend of the dog fiasco we sat in the vet's office for like four hours, so of course we ate whatever we could get our hands on that afternoon.
The second slow work week (last week) I was better, because I had a session with one of my favorite people, Nadia. I think in my last blog I had mentioned that she asked me why I was punishing myself with bad foods, and I spent the two weeks in between sessions thinking about reasons that I punish myself. So when I went to see her this week I told her that I think that made things worse because I just kept dredging up all this negative history in my life. And then she posed the question, "So why aren't you rewarding yourself?" She gave me some homework to validate myself everyday, no matter how hokey it sounds. And I've been doing it, it does feel a little hokey, but let me tell you I have driven past the fast food places more frequently and I have been more diligent about my smoothies this week. I have been taking ten minutes in the evening before I go to bed to tell myself that I did a good job during the day. It's basically meditation.
I feel like I need rehab, like drug addicts do. I need someone to teach me what to do with my feelings positive or negative. I went to a training this weekend that got me VERY excited, and all I wanted to do when I got out was eat to celebrate. Then I found out the building that my office is in got broken into last weekend and I'm a little afraid of that, of course all I wanted to do after I heard about it was eat to comfort myself. What am I supposed to do instead?!?!?! Maybe I should take up smoking. HaHa JUST KIDDING.
I don't really have a Cure this week, because honestly I wasn't very diligent with the plan and I was an emotional roller coaster. Maybe that's the Cure...by focusing on a nutrient-dense diet I don't have time for my life to be an emotional roller coaster. Actually that worries me a little, why can't I do both? Why can't I stick to the plan AND deal with the ups and downs? It'll come in time I suppose.
Ugh, sorry this isn't a very positive posting this week. Thank you all for reminding me to do it and keeping me on track. Here's my latest favorite recipe I got it from a friend's daughter's blog and I think she got it from Vegetarian Times. I've tweaked it just a little.
Ingredients
1 large bunch kale (1 1/4 to 1 1/2 lbs.) rinsed, de-stemmed and chopped
12 oz. udon noodles (you can get these in a regular grocery store in the Asian section)
2 Tbs. toasted sesame oil or to taste
1 can of artichoke hearts (not in oil) chopped
2 Tbs. toasted white or black sesame seeds (i didn't even toast them, just put them in)
Directions
1. Use a little bit more water then you normally would for 12oz of pasta. Bring it to a boil.
2. Add pasta and cook for 5 minutes less than cooking time indicated on package. Add kale stems and leaves, pressing down with back of large spoon to submerge. Continue cooking, uncovered, over high heat until kale and pasta are tender, about 5 minutes. (Kale tends to remain on top of pasta. Press it under water from time to time with back of large spoon.)
3. Drain pasta and kale and return to pot. Add sesame oil and artichoke hearts and toss with fork. Taste and add more sesame oil if necessary. Add sesame seeds and toss again. Serve hot or at room temperature.
Friday, July 2, 2010
7/2/10 - 291 lbs
My sister reminded me today that I am past due on my blogging. I'm having a bit of a personal crisis today, so I'm not sure if this is the best day to do this, but what the heck.
So, I lost 4lbs last month. Hooray! A pound a week isn't so bad. I was thrilled to see a loss on the scale, and that is by the original scale at the YWCA. The scale at home is like 10lbs heavier!
My very intuitive friend, Nadia, is trying to help me figure out why I punish myself by eating fast food. I had told her my favorite saying, "If there was no such thing as fast food I would be a crack-head." And of course she came back at me with, "What are you punishing yourself for?" Because really that's what addicts are doing right? Punishing themselves for some inner wrong-doing. What I've come up with so far is that deep down I am just a people-pleaser. And because we all know you can't please all of the people all of the time, I tend to be really hard on myself for it.
It's really ironic because I am seriously the least insecure person in the world. Despite my obesity I don't think of myself as fat. I'm not afraid to sit in a restaurant or a movie theater by myself. I am not jealous of other women. I'm not obsessing about what every guy in my close vicinity thinks (or any vicinity for that matter). I don't care what people think about me in a superficial way. But if someone gives me the finger when I'm driving to work I make an immediate turn into one of the 15 fast food restaurants I have to drive by everyday. Or God forbid one of my clients, co-workers or employers expresses that they are unhappy about something! That could lead to a week-long binge.
So how does one get off this crazy cycle? I don't know. I can say that when I am really focused on my high-nutrient diet its like a hobby. I have something to think about, I'm paying attention to how I feel and what I have to do to stay on track. This allows me to care a little bit less about what the asshole in the Audi thinks of me. I think high-nutrient food also makes me think a little bit clearer, so I am prepared for the occasional "critique" from clients. Being my own co-worker and my own employer helps a lot too.
Today, in particular, I am discovering that eating a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to headaches. I've been eating "the old way" for a couple of days and I have a killer migraine. I'm sure if I make myself a smoothie for dessert instead of eating popcorn with marshmallows and chocolate syrup (it is amazing but DON'T DO IT!) I will find my headache disappearing.
I want to thank my six followers (six!), and all the Facebookers that are reading and commenting. You guys keep my head in the game. You make me accountable.
Here's my favorite smoothie recipe:
1 cup vanilla soy milk
1 cup frozen blueberries (frozen is much cheaper than fresh, gotta have a good blender though)
1 cup frozen strawberries
1 orange (peeled)
1 banana (peeled)
3 dates
1 Tbls ground flaxseed
It fits perfectly in the Starbucks Venti Cups that look like the disposable cups but have a screw on top, are hard plastic, double-walled and reusable (I'm sure one of my Starbucks friends will comment with the official name for this). Yes its a lot of fruit, but berries have the least amount of sugar of all the fruits, oranges are an important source of fiber and bananas, believe it or not, have protein in them. They all have tons of vitamins and anti-oxidants. Once I've had this I can't have any more fruit for the day and I really try to avoid any other kind of "sugar" like bread, pasta, etc. This thing has replaced my morning coffee, I get tons of energy from it, it gets things moving (if ya know what I mean) and it tastes really good.
So, I lost 4lbs last month. Hooray! A pound a week isn't so bad. I was thrilled to see a loss on the scale, and that is by the original scale at the YWCA. The scale at home is like 10lbs heavier!
My very intuitive friend, Nadia, is trying to help me figure out why I punish myself by eating fast food. I had told her my favorite saying, "If there was no such thing as fast food I would be a crack-head." And of course she came back at me with, "What are you punishing yourself for?" Because really that's what addicts are doing right? Punishing themselves for some inner wrong-doing. What I've come up with so far is that deep down I am just a people-pleaser. And because we all know you can't please all of the people all of the time, I tend to be really hard on myself for it.
It's really ironic because I am seriously the least insecure person in the world. Despite my obesity I don't think of myself as fat. I'm not afraid to sit in a restaurant or a movie theater by myself. I am not jealous of other women. I'm not obsessing about what every guy in my close vicinity thinks (or any vicinity for that matter). I don't care what people think about me in a superficial way. But if someone gives me the finger when I'm driving to work I make an immediate turn into one of the 15 fast food restaurants I have to drive by everyday. Or God forbid one of my clients, co-workers or employers expresses that they are unhappy about something! That could lead to a week-long binge.
So how does one get off this crazy cycle? I don't know. I can say that when I am really focused on my high-nutrient diet its like a hobby. I have something to think about, I'm paying attention to how I feel and what I have to do to stay on track. This allows me to care a little bit less about what the asshole in the Audi thinks of me. I think high-nutrient food also makes me think a little bit clearer, so I am prepared for the occasional "critique" from clients. Being my own co-worker and my own employer helps a lot too.
Today, in particular, I am discovering that eating a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to headaches. I've been eating "the old way" for a couple of days and I have a killer migraine. I'm sure if I make myself a smoothie for dessert instead of eating popcorn with marshmallows and chocolate syrup (it is amazing but DON'T DO IT!) I will find my headache disappearing.
I want to thank my six followers (six!), and all the Facebookers that are reading and commenting. You guys keep my head in the game. You make me accountable.
Here's my favorite smoothie recipe:
1 cup vanilla soy milk
1 cup frozen blueberries (frozen is much cheaper than fresh, gotta have a good blender though)
1 cup frozen strawberries
1 orange (peeled)
1 banana (peeled)
3 dates
1 Tbls ground flaxseed
It fits perfectly in the Starbucks Venti Cups that look like the disposable cups but have a screw on top, are hard plastic, double-walled and reusable (I'm sure one of my Starbucks friends will comment with the official name for this). Yes its a lot of fruit, but berries have the least amount of sugar of all the fruits, oranges are an important source of fiber and bananas, believe it or not, have protein in them. They all have tons of vitamins and anti-oxidants. Once I've had this I can't have any more fruit for the day and I really try to avoid any other kind of "sugar" like bread, pasta, etc. This thing has replaced my morning coffee, I get tons of energy from it, it gets things moving (if ya know what I mean) and it tastes really good.
Monday, June 21, 2010
6/21/10
I can't believe I missed a post last week! I worked literally everyday for two weeks if that's any excuse. I kept thinking, "I should post now even though its late." The next thing I know its already a new week!
Well the good news is, despite my crazy-busy schedule I stayed on track. I made smoothies every single morning and I took my lunch most days. On the couple of days that I didn't have my lunch with me I ate either a Veggie Delight sandwich or salad from Subway. My brother-in-law from CO gave me a membership to Joel Furhman's website www.eatrightamerica.com and have been experimenting with the recipes on there for dinner.
We did go out to dinner this weekend and ate a less than healthy meal, but we have always said that when we want to have a steak we are going to have a steak. This weekend was one of those times. We went to High Point to get get something from Hobby Lobby and one of our favorite restaurants is right across the street, Liberty Steakhouse. We had to go, couldn't help it.
I bought a scale to have at home so I don't have to make a special trip to the YWCA just to weigh myself. But the scale that I bought shows me as being about 10lbs heavier than the one at the YW. So I've really been diligent about sticking to the plan so that when it comes time to weigh in maybe I'll still show a loss. Its been a little bit of a struggle for me to not get on that dang thing every day. Steve hid it from me...haha. Of course Steve does get on it everyday and he's lost about a pound a day for the past week! I told him to stop telling me his weight because it is discouraging me in a way.
I was looking at pictures of myself from 2001-2004. I looked so good! In reality I was about 240lbs, but compared to what I am now I was skinny! I was telling my husband that to get to that weight and maintain it I had to work REALLY hard. In 2001 he and I had been chatting on the internet and hadn't met in person yet so I was working my ass off to lose as much weight as I possibly could. I had been doing the no-carb thing and working out at the gym every single day. I can't even imagine what it would take to get to 140lbs! Just one time in my life I would like to weigh 140 lbs. If I get close to it and I start to look emaciated I will accept 150 or 160, but even to be below 200 would be such a huge accomplishment. Hopefully you'll all get to be witness to that.
This week I'm going to say that eating a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to a sluggish energy level. When we ate that steak dinner, I had one beer. But when I woke up the next morning I felt like I had ten beers. I was sluggish and tired and had no energy. But the prior two weeks when I was eating "whole foods" with lots of nutrient density I would jump out of bed every morning, no stiffness, no headaches. My smoothies have taken the place of my coffee, they give me energy and make me feel great.
Well the good news is, despite my crazy-busy schedule I stayed on track. I made smoothies every single morning and I took my lunch most days. On the couple of days that I didn't have my lunch with me I ate either a Veggie Delight sandwich or salad from Subway. My brother-in-law from CO gave me a membership to Joel Furhman's website www.eatrightamerica.com and have been experimenting with the recipes on there for dinner.
We did go out to dinner this weekend and ate a less than healthy meal, but we have always said that when we want to have a steak we are going to have a steak. This weekend was one of those times. We went to High Point to get get something from Hobby Lobby and one of our favorite restaurants is right across the street, Liberty Steakhouse. We had to go, couldn't help it.
I bought a scale to have at home so I don't have to make a special trip to the YWCA just to weigh myself. But the scale that I bought shows me as being about 10lbs heavier than the one at the YW. So I've really been diligent about sticking to the plan so that when it comes time to weigh in maybe I'll still show a loss. Its been a little bit of a struggle for me to not get on that dang thing every day. Steve hid it from me...haha. Of course Steve does get on it everyday and he's lost about a pound a day for the past week! I told him to stop telling me his weight because it is discouraging me in a way.
I was looking at pictures of myself from 2001-2004. I looked so good! In reality I was about 240lbs, but compared to what I am now I was skinny! I was telling my husband that to get to that weight and maintain it I had to work REALLY hard. In 2001 he and I had been chatting on the internet and hadn't met in person yet so I was working my ass off to lose as much weight as I possibly could. I had been doing the no-carb thing and working out at the gym every single day. I can't even imagine what it would take to get to 140lbs! Just one time in my life I would like to weigh 140 lbs. If I get close to it and I start to look emaciated I will accept 150 or 160, but even to be below 200 would be such a huge accomplishment. Hopefully you'll all get to be witness to that.
This week I'm going to say that eating a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to a sluggish energy level. When we ate that steak dinner, I had one beer. But when I woke up the next morning I felt like I had ten beers. I was sluggish and tired and had no energy. But the prior two weeks when I was eating "whole foods" with lots of nutrient density I would jump out of bed every morning, no stiffness, no headaches. My smoothies have taken the place of my coffee, they give me energy and make me feel great.
Monday, June 7, 2010
6/7/10
I think I'm getting a little later each time with my posts. Last week was an incredibly stressful week. I took on this new "trade" in my Gwen Of All Trades business and its turning out to be more trouble than its worth. So of course what do I do when I'm stressed??? I eat junk. I think I ate meat and dairy and sugar and fast food and everything that I said I'm not going to do every single day last week. I bought myself a scale, but I am not about to get on it right now.
Ironically when I am at home I am fine. We have nothing but fruits, vegetables, beans and a few whole grain items in our fridge and cupboards, so at home I'm good. That may have kept me safe in the scale department. But as soon as I leave the house forget about it.
Can I just tell you that Peters Creek Parkway, the main road that I have to take to get ANYWHERE, has about 15 fast food restaurants on it. I'm serious in the three mile stretch from my house to I-40 there are : two McDonalds, two BKs, Wendys, Arbys, Cook Out, Taco Bell, Dunkin Donuts, Hardees, Bojangles and they're building a Chik-Fila and another Bojangles!! Thankfully the last two of the 15 are Subways, that has been another saving grace for me. When I can't get home to eat a good nutritional meal I at least try to eat Subway where I can get a Veggie Delight and at least get some whole food nutrients. I've also tried to get into the habit of using Whole Foods as one of my "fast food" places. When I'm out and about and hungry I try to stop in there for something quick, they have a lot of pre-packaged stuff that is really yummy and really healthy.
Well this weekend I officially "let go" of that other endeavor that I had taken on, so I can open myself back up to being busy with teaching CPR and doing massages and eating healthy. I would have to say that this week eating a healthy, nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to being clear-headed. When you eat crappy you lose sight of priorities which in turn makes life chaotic which in turn makes you eat crappy. I have chosen this weekend to get out of the vicious cycle, to make my "sobriety" my priority and not add more and more businesses to my already full roster.
Ironically when I am at home I am fine. We have nothing but fruits, vegetables, beans and a few whole grain items in our fridge and cupboards, so at home I'm good. That may have kept me safe in the scale department. But as soon as I leave the house forget about it.
Can I just tell you that Peters Creek Parkway, the main road that I have to take to get ANYWHERE, has about 15 fast food restaurants on it. I'm serious in the three mile stretch from my house to I-40 there are : two McDonalds, two BKs, Wendys, Arbys, Cook Out, Taco Bell, Dunkin Donuts, Hardees, Bojangles and they're building a Chik-Fila and another Bojangles!! Thankfully the last two of the 15 are Subways, that has been another saving grace for me. When I can't get home to eat a good nutritional meal I at least try to eat Subway where I can get a Veggie Delight and at least get some whole food nutrients. I've also tried to get into the habit of using Whole Foods as one of my "fast food" places. When I'm out and about and hungry I try to stop in there for something quick, they have a lot of pre-packaged stuff that is really yummy and really healthy.
Well this weekend I officially "let go" of that other endeavor that I had taken on, so I can open myself back up to being busy with teaching CPR and doing massages and eating healthy. I would have to say that this week eating a healthy, nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to being clear-headed. When you eat crappy you lose sight of priorities which in turn makes life chaotic which in turn makes you eat crappy. I have chosen this weekend to get out of the vicious cycle, to make my "sobriety" my priority and not add more and more businesses to my already full roster.
Monday, May 31, 2010
5/30/10 - 295lbs
The topic of this week's blog is....OMG!!!
OMG I have followers!! How cool is that?
OMG I came home last Wednesday to find a Vita-Mix on my front porch! Muchas, muchas gracias to my bro-in-law Bill. It came with a note that simply said, "Been following your blog, keep up the good work." Bill is always so generous, but this was above and beyond generous. I was crying when I opened the box. And I have seriously used it every single day since it came.
OMG I've lost 15 lbs in a month!! I was going to take a picture, but the only full-length mirror I have access to is in the locker room at the gym and I got some dirty looks from the ladies who were changing their clothes when I pulled out my camera phone. I don't think 15lbs has made that much impact on my looks yet anyway.
The great thing is that I have lost 15lbs in a month without being absolutely perfect. I'm living what I call an 80-10-10 lifestyle. I stole that from a lady in Arbonne who's name I cannot remember right now, and I will explain why I'm listening to people from Arbonne in a minute. So 80% of the time I am eating vegetarian, I'm not going to insult the vegans of the world by saying I am "trying" to be vegan. "Do or do not...there is no try," is what all my vegan Yodas would say. Then 10% of the time I allow myself to slip by eating cheese here and there, maybe even meat from time to time. The last 10% is all out crazy, eating whatever I want. In the past 24 days I have had about six "slip ups". Now if you break that down into meals...24 days since the last time I weighed-in times 3 meals a day equals 72 meals...six "slip ups" is less than 10% and not even close to 20%. YAY ME!
OK, why am I getting eating advice from Arbonne Consultants? Because I am one! As of May 27th I am officially selling Arbonne. Not only do they have great skin and body care that is all flower and plant based, but they also have a line of nutritional shakes and supplements. And everything they sell is certified vegan! I'll be having little classes and parties every week to educate my friends about the nutritional line and pamper them with all the spa products, so read your emails and texts and those pesky postcards you are getting from me.
Last but not least...The Cure. This is going to be especially interesting to all you Ranch-o-philes (people with a compulsion for ranch). Per the advice of Joel Fuhrman, M.D. in his book Eat to Live I have started putting a squeeze of lemon and just an iddy-biddy sprinkling of feta and an iddy-biddy sprinkling of olive oil on my salads and it is delicious. I can't wait to eat salads this way, its unbelievable. So, following Dr. Fuhrman's book is The Cure to a life-long addiction to ranch dressing.
Last little tip....flax seed + water + mustard + soy sauce + vitamix = elmer's glue. It was supposed to be a salad dressing, but that is not what happened.
OMG I have followers!! How cool is that?
OMG I came home last Wednesday to find a Vita-Mix on my front porch! Muchas, muchas gracias to my bro-in-law Bill. It came with a note that simply said, "Been following your blog, keep up the good work." Bill is always so generous, but this was above and beyond generous. I was crying when I opened the box. And I have seriously used it every single day since it came.
OMG I've lost 15 lbs in a month!! I was going to take a picture, but the only full-length mirror I have access to is in the locker room at the gym and I got some dirty looks from the ladies who were changing their clothes when I pulled out my camera phone. I don't think 15lbs has made that much impact on my looks yet anyway.
The great thing is that I have lost 15lbs in a month without being absolutely perfect. I'm living what I call an 80-10-10 lifestyle. I stole that from a lady in Arbonne who's name I cannot remember right now, and I will explain why I'm listening to people from Arbonne in a minute. So 80% of the time I am eating vegetarian, I'm not going to insult the vegans of the world by saying I am "trying" to be vegan. "Do or do not...there is no try," is what all my vegan Yodas would say. Then 10% of the time I allow myself to slip by eating cheese here and there, maybe even meat from time to time. The last 10% is all out crazy, eating whatever I want. In the past 24 days I have had about six "slip ups". Now if you break that down into meals...24 days since the last time I weighed-in times 3 meals a day equals 72 meals...six "slip ups" is less than 10% and not even close to 20%. YAY ME!
OK, why am I getting eating advice from Arbonne Consultants? Because I am one! As of May 27th I am officially selling Arbonne. Not only do they have great skin and body care that is all flower and plant based, but they also have a line of nutritional shakes and supplements. And everything they sell is certified vegan! I'll be having little classes and parties every week to educate my friends about the nutritional line and pamper them with all the spa products, so read your emails and texts and those pesky postcards you are getting from me.
Last but not least...The Cure. This is going to be especially interesting to all you Ranch-o-philes (people with a compulsion for ranch). Per the advice of Joel Fuhrman, M.D. in his book Eat to Live I have started putting a squeeze of lemon and just an iddy-biddy sprinkling of feta and an iddy-biddy sprinkling of olive oil on my salads and it is delicious. I can't wait to eat salads this way, its unbelievable. So, following Dr. Fuhrman's book is The Cure to a life-long addiction to ranch dressing.
Last little tip....flax seed + water + mustard + soy sauce + vitamix = elmer's glue. It was supposed to be a salad dressing, but that is not what happened.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
5/23/10
I don't own a scale, by choice. And I haven't been able to get over to the YWCA to weigh myself this week. I had originally said I wasn't going to weigh myself for the first six weeks of this plan, so maybe I should just stick to that. I have had many, many compliments. People that I haven't seen in a long time are all saying, "Wow! You look great! What are you doing?" So that really is enough verification that I'm doing something right.
This has been a really important week in my process. I have gotten to the point where I can get myself excited about certain types of food. Instead of craving bacon cheeseburgers I crave chipotle black bean burgers. Instead of chips and dip I look forward to eating carrots and hummus. Usually on Sunday mornings my husband and I go out to breakfast and I have eggs, sausage, bacon, hashbrowns. Today I could not wait to get up and make a smoothie with all the powders my sister sent me (yacon, lacuma and maca). Everyday that gets a little stronger, its so exciting.
While that sounds so inspiring, I am still struggling. This week I had two situations where I let myself "off the hook".
I knew that on Thursday I was going to a baseball game. I had decided in advance that this would me my one night of freedom where I could eat whatever I wanted. We had these great seats in the VIP section where they have a bar and a buffet. I do have to say that I didn't go to the bar and all, and when I went to the buffet I did a quick glance to see what the vegetarian options were. Potatoes, gnocchi, pasta salad and coleslaw were those options: starch, starch, more starch and cabbage covered in mayonnaise. So, because I had already decided I was going to eat what I wanted anyway, I ate hot dogs. Oh, also because I had pre-determined that I was going to eat whatever I wanted at the game I ate at Burger King earlier in the day.
On Saturday my husband and I decided to go to the NASCAR All-Star Race. Now since this was a last minute decision I did not eat crap all day the day of the event. I actually ate Whole Foods Mock Chicken Salad, 365 Woven Wheat Crackers and olives and some soup that I'm going to talk about a little later in this post. But again, because in my mind this was a special event, I ate whatever I wanted once we got on our way. We at McD's on the way there, ate crap while we were there, then stopped at Wendy's on the way home. Let me just tell you, I was sure I was going to die in my sleep from a heart attack last night. All that disgusting food (which didn't even taste that great really) and then all the walking and climbing stairs at the race, I was sure I was going to die. And when i woke up this morning, while I was happy to be alive, I felt like I had drank three bottles of wine.
The funny thing is, after both of those days of allowing myself to eat whatever I wanted I felt the need to purge myself with tons of water, fruits and vegetables. Friday and Sunday were nothing but smoothies, soups, veggie burgers, etc. I'm looking forward to the next "special event" as a challenge. How can I go to something that I normally associate with food and enjoy myself without eating? Or maybe the challenge is still allowing food to be a part of the "special event" but making it nutrient-dense? The good, high-energy feeling that I have when I eat nutrient-dense foods and the sluggish, low-energy feeling I have when I eat fast food is starting to register with me. I like the first one the best.
Even though my realization that I want to feel good is the main topic of my post this week, I am going to say that this week eating a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to irregularity. Not that I suffer from irregularity, but my bowel movements have tripled since I started this whole thing. Every book I read about good health says that if you can get your bowels moving that is half the battle, I think I'm there.
Speaking of regularity, this week I made Dr. Furhmann's Anti-Cancer Soup. What an endeavor! And what a huge pot of soup! I think I made it last Sunday and we still have a couple containers of it in the fridge. It's good stuff, but a lot of work. I don't have a Vita-Mix and my blender isn't very big so I ended up pureeing the whole thing with a hand blender. The cool thing is that I put some of it in these 1-Liter bottles I usually use for water and just carried it around with me all day. When I was hungry I would just take a swig (got some weird looks drinking what looked like Shrek juice, but oh well). It was kind of like a savory smoothie, and it kept me full all day.
This has been a really important week in my process. I have gotten to the point where I can get myself excited about certain types of food. Instead of craving bacon cheeseburgers I crave chipotle black bean burgers. Instead of chips and dip I look forward to eating carrots and hummus. Usually on Sunday mornings my husband and I go out to breakfast and I have eggs, sausage, bacon, hashbrowns. Today I could not wait to get up and make a smoothie with all the powders my sister sent me (yacon, lacuma and maca). Everyday that gets a little stronger, its so exciting.
While that sounds so inspiring, I am still struggling. This week I had two situations where I let myself "off the hook".
I knew that on Thursday I was going to a baseball game. I had decided in advance that this would me my one night of freedom where I could eat whatever I wanted. We had these great seats in the VIP section where they have a bar and a buffet. I do have to say that I didn't go to the bar and all, and when I went to the buffet I did a quick glance to see what the vegetarian options were. Potatoes, gnocchi, pasta salad and coleslaw were those options: starch, starch, more starch and cabbage covered in mayonnaise. So, because I had already decided I was going to eat what I wanted anyway, I ate hot dogs. Oh, also because I had pre-determined that I was going to eat whatever I wanted at the game I ate at Burger King earlier in the day.
On Saturday my husband and I decided to go to the NASCAR All-Star Race. Now since this was a last minute decision I did not eat crap all day the day of the event. I actually ate Whole Foods Mock Chicken Salad, 365 Woven Wheat Crackers and olives and some soup that I'm going to talk about a little later in this post. But again, because in my mind this was a special event, I ate whatever I wanted once we got on our way. We at McD's on the way there, ate crap while we were there, then stopped at Wendy's on the way home. Let me just tell you, I was sure I was going to die in my sleep from a heart attack last night. All that disgusting food (which didn't even taste that great really) and then all the walking and climbing stairs at the race, I was sure I was going to die. And when i woke up this morning, while I was happy to be alive, I felt like I had drank three bottles of wine.
The funny thing is, after both of those days of allowing myself to eat whatever I wanted I felt the need to purge myself with tons of water, fruits and vegetables. Friday and Sunday were nothing but smoothies, soups, veggie burgers, etc. I'm looking forward to the next "special event" as a challenge. How can I go to something that I normally associate with food and enjoy myself without eating? Or maybe the challenge is still allowing food to be a part of the "special event" but making it nutrient-dense? The good, high-energy feeling that I have when I eat nutrient-dense foods and the sluggish, low-energy feeling I have when I eat fast food is starting to register with me. I like the first one the best.
Even though my realization that I want to feel good is the main topic of my post this week, I am going to say that this week eating a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to irregularity. Not that I suffer from irregularity, but my bowel movements have tripled since I started this whole thing. Every book I read about good health says that if you can get your bowels moving that is half the battle, I think I'm there.
Speaking of regularity, this week I made Dr. Furhmann's Anti-Cancer Soup. What an endeavor! And what a huge pot of soup! I think I made it last Sunday and we still have a couple containers of it in the fridge. It's good stuff, but a lot of work. I don't have a Vita-Mix and my blender isn't very big so I ended up pureeing the whole thing with a hand blender. The cool thing is that I put some of it in these 1-Liter bottles I usually use for water and just carried it around with me all day. When I was hungry I would just take a swig (got some weird looks drinking what looked like Shrek juice, but oh well). It was kind of like a savory smoothie, and it kept me full all day.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
5/15/10 - No Weight
Well this has been an interesting week. I didn't do a very good job of shopping and preparing food, so I found myself eating vegan but eating crap. French fries are vegan right? So once I realized I was not really accomplishing my goal of eating healthy I threw the whole plan out the window and just started eating whatever I wanted. For our anniversary we ate seafood, I had a couple of stressful/busy days where I ate fast food, we had a gift certificate to Brixx so we went there on Thursday and had the worst of the worst (bruscetta, pizza, pasta AND dessert), and I went to a wedding where they had a mashed potato bar of all things (they also had a buffet of candy...are you kidding me?!)*. I guess I could say I ate vegetarian at the wedding, but even though the butter, sour cream, cheese are considered vegetarian they are not nutrient-dense in any way, shape or form. Oh and there was bacon, so that REALLY didn't count. At that point I had pretty much given up on vegan/vegetarian/nutrient-dense....everything. (Which is why I refused to weigh myself this week.)
But then I came home and there was a little box on my doorstep. My sister had sent me a gift set from www.oneluckyduck.com of different powders to put in shakes and other vegan recipes to add flavor and nutrients. Awwwwwwww! I can't quit now! I also woke up the next morning after the pizza and pasta feast feeling like a slug. All that crappy food had caught up to me. I couldn't get out of a bed. I've also gotten some aches and pains back that had disappeared for a while.
I went to Costco and Whole Foods and spent a whole lot of money on all kinds of stuff to get me back on track. Now don't get discouraged, I spent a lot of money because I bought a lot of stuff I didn't have: herbs, spices, vinegars, grains, etc. Now that I have all that I can buy a little at a time and not spend quite as much money. If you aren't eating out and you aren't eating fast food you will have the money to spend at the grocery store.
So this week I have to say that a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to feeling like a slug when you wake up in the morning. When I eat healthy I wake up feeling good. Not only do I wake up with a clear head, but I can walk across the bedroom without my back, knees and feet screaming at me. And I don't think I've lost any weight yet, but my aches and pains are still going away. I strongly feel that certain things that are in the processed foods we eat cause unnecessary pain.
I have another motivation factor. One of my massage clients was fascinated by what I'm doing. I don't think she believed me when I told her that you get all the protein you need by eating fruits and vegetables. I see her every three weeks, so I really, really want to stick to this so that when I see her in three weeks I can tell her just how much weight I've lost without feeling weak and sick and anemic.
*By the way Ashley your wedding was fabulous, I am not knocking your potato bar or your candy buffet, they were two of the most original things I have every seen at a wedding. I am knocking my own inability to be strong.
But then I came home and there was a little box on my doorstep. My sister had sent me a gift set from www.oneluckyduck.com of different powders to put in shakes and other vegan recipes to add flavor and nutrients. Awwwwwwww! I can't quit now! I also woke up the next morning after the pizza and pasta feast feeling like a slug. All that crappy food had caught up to me. I couldn't get out of a bed. I've also gotten some aches and pains back that had disappeared for a while.
I went to Costco and Whole Foods and spent a whole lot of money on all kinds of stuff to get me back on track. Now don't get discouraged, I spent a lot of money because I bought a lot of stuff I didn't have: herbs, spices, vinegars, grains, etc. Now that I have all that I can buy a little at a time and not spend quite as much money. If you aren't eating out and you aren't eating fast food you will have the money to spend at the grocery store.
So this week I have to say that a nutrient-dense diet is The Cure to feeling like a slug when you wake up in the morning. When I eat healthy I wake up feeling good. Not only do I wake up with a clear head, but I can walk across the bedroom without my back, knees and feet screaming at me. And I don't think I've lost any weight yet, but my aches and pains are still going away. I strongly feel that certain things that are in the processed foods we eat cause unnecessary pain.
I have another motivation factor. One of my massage clients was fascinated by what I'm doing. I don't think she believed me when I told her that you get all the protein you need by eating fruits and vegetables. I see her every three weeks, so I really, really want to stick to this so that when I see her in three weeks I can tell her just how much weight I've lost without feeling weak and sick and anemic.
*By the way Ashley your wedding was fabulous, I am not knocking your potato bar or your candy buffet, they were two of the most original things I have every seen at a wedding. I am knocking my own inability to be strong.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
5/6/10 - 310lbs
So I've been reading the book "Eat to Live". I've been daydreaming about following the plan and blogging about what its done for me and changing the lives of millions of people. Except that today was day-one and I am already tired of it. Dr. Fuhrmann says in the book that the first few days (possibly weeks) will feel like drug with-drawls. I haven't felt sick or anything, but I want cheese, I want meat, I want to eat junk food.My plan is to blog on a weekly basis about how this plan is truly a cure. Today my husband would tell you its the cure to domesticated-itis. I've probably cooked five meals in five years and done the dishes just as many times (I have an amazing husband who has been cooking and doing the dishes for five years). Last night I stayed up late making my shakes, then I came home from work today and made dinner AND did the dishes.
I was also very strong today. I wanted to stop at the vending machine at the hospital. I wanted to stop at the pizza place at the hospital. I wanted to try the bison sausage samples with dill dip at Whole Foods. And I didn't do ANY OF IT. I drank my shakes all day and drank plenty of water. Also had vegan chili with "Food Should Taste Good" tortilla chips and hummus for dinner.
Originally my plan was to drink Green Shakes (recipe from my brother-in-law) all day and then have a regular vegan dinner because when I drank them while I was in Colorado I was never hungry. But when I was in Colorado I was sitting around doing nothing all day. Now I'm movin' and shakin' and I'm not sure the Green Shake is going to cut it. So I think I'm going to have the shake for breakfast and then have a salad (maybe some hummus) for lunch and then a soup, stew or chili for dinner.
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